I hope this question wasn't too confusing, thanks for your time and hopefully advice! Ok, you need to read books Sir It sounds like you are asking her to submit to you during a sex session.
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You're in charge, she does what you tell her to do, etc. The rules are not told to your partner, they are part of the discussion around negotiation of the session. Negotiation should always be done between two equals. Negotiation includes things like aftercare needed, limits on where to hit or touch or types of play.
Sex or no sex? What is sex? How long the scene will last? Who is involved in the scene? Where the session will take place? What kind of toys will be used and more importantly, not used? What is the safeword for the session? Theses are many of the items needed to be understood and negotiated between equals before play starts. I couldn't agree more, South!
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Hey, I'm in Southern AZ too! Tucson here. Sorry if I'm wrong. There really needs to be an Internet equivalent to a curtsy! For the OP, the thing with submitting to a man is that there has to be the utmost trust there, and if you aren't quite there yet, you can't force it, obviously you know that or you wouldn't be here asking advice , you can only earn it. I agree about starting with the fuzzy cuffs or Amazon has a great set for 20 bucks, a relatively mild under bed restraint system, blindfold, feather tickler, paddle, for when she's been a bad, bad girl and just start slower.
Oh, and tell her she's your good girl when she is. I have yet to talk to any woman, of any age, that doesn't go absolutely wild when their man calls them a good girl, or girl in general. I cannot get enough of it, personally.
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That he has had blanket consent since pm May 23, , the day we married. He isn't even a vanilla really, but he is a genuinely good man that is a gentleman, but I can see the strength and dominance just underneath the surface dying, begging to come out and play with me, I wish I knew how to wake the sleeping primal side up.
Any ideas are always welcome from anyone! He just has to get by what society has taught him all these years. I still set us back who knows how far by coming on too strong. I should've started with bedroom sessions, then moved up to "begging" as his sub for a full time Domestic Discipline dynamic.
I saw someone say that if she offers you submission and it doesn't at least give you a chubby in the back of your mind, it's likely not for you. Which is a devastating thought to me. I've pushed this down for so long, I just can't anymore! Society makes us all prudes and to feel like a depraved, abusive, asshole if you want to or if you do these things to a woman, or a dirty, previously abused, in need of psychotherapy whore if you want a man to do these things to you.
Don't even get me started on what people think if you're a girl like me with an unbelievably strong fantasy of being forced, ravished, taken, also called consensual non-consent. Except I dont want it to only be in my head. I think that may have not helped either, cuz thats what I opened with a few days before. That can take a little training to get passed. Provided also, That this act, or any thing therein contained, shall not extend, nor be construed to extend, to give any person, being owner of any slave or slaves, and not seized of other real estate, the right or privilege as a freeholder, meant, mentioned, and intended, by one act of this present session of assembly, intituled, An act for regulating the elections of Burgesses, for settling their privileges, and for ascertaining their allowances.
Provided also, That it shall and may be lawful, for any person, to sue for, and recover, any slave, or damage, for the detainer, trover, or conversion therof, by action personal, as might have been done if this act had never been made.
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Provided always, That where the nature of the case shall require it, any writ De Partitione facienda, or of dower, may be sued forth and prosecuted, to recover the right and possession of any such slave or slaves. Provided, and be it enacted, That when any person dies intestate, leaving several children, in that case all the slaves of such person, except the widow's dower, which is to be first set apart shall be inventoried and appraised; and the value therof shall be equally divided amongst all the said children; and the several proportions, according to such valuation and appraisement, shall be paid by the heir to whom the said slaves shall descend, by virtue of this act unto all and every the other said children.
And thereupon, it shall and may be lawful for the said other children, and every of them, and their executors or administrators, as the case shall be, to commence and prosecute an action upon the case, at the common law, against such heir, his heirs, executors and administrators, for the recovery of their said several proportions, respectively.
And be it further enacted by the authority aforesaid, That if any widow, seised of any such slave or slaves, as aforesaid, as of the dower of her husband, shall send, or voluntarily permit to be sent out of this colony and dominion, such slave or slaves, or any of their increase, without the lawful consent of him or her in revesion, such widow shall forfeit all and every such slave or slaves, and all other the dower which she holds of the endowment of her husband's estate, unto the person or persons that shall have the reversion thereof; any law, usage or custom to the contrary notwithstanding.
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